Archive for the ‘Beginnings’ Category

I’ve never been huge on New Year’s.  When you get down to it, the clock turning from 11:59 to midnight on December 31, is really no different than when that happens on, say April 5.  Years are real, but time is constant.  The numbering is something we made up arbitrarily (or not if you’re a Christian, please don’t send me mail).  I’ve also always been a firm believer that if you want to effect some sort of change in your life, do it whenever, don’t sit around and wait for the calendar year to flip.

This year though, things are different.   I definitely feel different somehow.

I’m good.  Things don’t bother me.  I’m less worried and I feel calmer about myself, my life, people around me.  I feel more free in a way.  I’m not trying to anticipate the future.  And I’m not naive.  I know it might not last.  But I’ll take it while I can.

I know that a lot of people, from bloggers to FB friends to those in my 3-D world have expressed a frustration with 2008 and a happiness to see it over.  It seems like for a lot of people anyway 2008 was sucktastic.  Even the Daily Show in its own mocking way referenced many people’s opinion that 2009 was a year of change and hope.  So, if you’re one of those people who couldn’t wait to kick 2008 to the curb, I hope that you too are finding some reassurance and calm in your 2009.  And that you too can say “Hey, nothing bad has happened to me this year.”


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It’s my birthday today; I’m 29.  I haven’t felt like celebrating in the days leading up to it.  So, I don’t know that there will be a party; I don’t expect presents or a big to-do.  That’s ok with me this year.  I’m happy for everything life has brought my way in the past 29 years, even if it hasn’t shaped up the way I wanted or expected it to.  When does it ever?  If everything were just the way we wanted it, we’d never strive to do or be anything more.  We wouldn’t change, life wouldn’t change, the world wouldn’t change.

I learned and did a lot over the past year.  I got my own apartment.  My grandmother died.  One of my best friend had a baby girl.  I took a chance and went down a path towards a relationship with someone; I opened up;  I got hurt, but I know someday I’ll realize the value of that experience.  I took my first business trip. I started to buy myself nice things–linens and appliances.  I got promoted. I made new friends.  I traveled.  I laughed. I drank a lot of wine and even more vodka.  I went home to Minnesota more often.  I reconnected with people.  I cried.  I went to the ER. I discovered new bands and went to concerts.  I lived.

So, 29.

Bring it on.

PS> Keep the Ask Me Anything Questions coming.  It’s not too late.  Answers are coming.

PPS> Back to musically inspired titles, I just like it too much to stray from it…

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The thing about moving is…it’s painful. I mean literally. Between painting, carry boxes up and down three flights of stairs and putting together furniture, ouch. It’s like I just started training for a triathlon or something. You know the whole, I have pain in muscles I didn’t even know I had thing? That’s where I am right now. Even all the tendons in my hands hurt. I suspect it’s from carrying boxes filled with garbage and packing materials down to the dumpster and gripping the flaps in my hands.

The thing about moving is…it’s exhausting. Seriously, I went to bed at 10:00 on Saturday night. I usually only do that if I am sick. Even on Saturday nights that are quiet ones, I’m not in bed at 10:00. But that night, it might as well have been 1:00 in the morning. And there’s so much to do that even yesterday when I was aroused from my deep sleep at 10 minutes to six, I decided to get up, power through and get. stuff. done.

The thing about moving is…you inevitably realize you need more stuff. Sure, I did a purge when I was packing everything up–“Do I really need this sweater I haven’t worn in two years? Or this eighth grade book report I’ve hung onto? (not really)”–but once in my new place, and things are unpacked, set up and on the walls, I found myself saying “Hmmm, think I need a piece of art for that wall. Or a shoe rack. Or towel hangers. Or a chair. Or a coatrack.” And I have to reign myself in since I don’t have the money for all that stuff. So, I need to make some decisions. Like how important is a coatrack as May is turning into June? And, the emptyness of the fridge is just sad. I look like some beer-guzzling salad freak, as there are currently 9 bottles of beer (which I don’t drink) and some salad mix/cucumbers in there.

The thing about moving is…you’ll lose something. I can’t find my iPod 😦

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Note: The use of the term “teetotal” in this post amused me to no end, especially after I saw the Wikipedia statement that a country prohibiting alcohol (think U.S. circa 1923) is called a teetotalitarian state.

My clothes aren’t fitting so well lately. Which means that either a) they all shrunk or b) I grew. Not one to believe in the random phenomena of entire wardrobe shrinkage, I’m going to have to go with option b.

Seeing as how I can’t really afford a brand new wardrobe, I’m left with the alternative of shrinking myself.  See, this moving thing is tying up my money.  There’s a security deposit, and some furniture I will need.  Oh and because I am such a nice friend who doesn’t want to ask her friends to help her move, I’m hiring movers.  So, unless Stacy and Clinton want to give me that whole $5,000 shopping trip to New York–because I think that clothes that are a bit snug are definitely What Not to Wear–it’s time to shrink.  Or maybe Stacy and Clinton just want to come shopping with me anyway?  I won’t fight you, promise.

I guess the fact that I’ve felt like crap lately helps me go with the plan to shrink too.  My daily diet has turned into an endless string of junk.  My once regular trips to the gym have turned sporadic, while my more sporadic drinking has turned more regular.  So for the sake of my clothes, my liver and my heart, a brief respite is in order. 

So, I resolve:

1. To get on the wagon.  I shall teetotal for a few weeks.  In fact, the only beverages I will consumer are water, coffee, tea and skim milk.  And I might even give the Special K water a try.  Anyone out there tried it?

2. Banish the junk.  No more french fries, cookies, candy or cake (with the exception of the blogger cupcake crawl of course).  Bring back the protein and produce.

3. Hit the gym.  Three to four times a week again.

4. Maybe do one of those cleansing fasts?  Still not 100 percent sure about that one.

There, you are all my witnesses.  Let the teetotaling begin.

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I am not a patient person. Not only do I want news and results ASAP, I want to get wherever I am going, pronto. So professionally speaking, being an intern got frustrating. Yet today it all paid off.

I got offered a job…with great benefits…doing something I enjoy. And while I’ve technically already started, it looks like Monday will be my first official day as a real, true salaried employee.

Oh, and by the way, Monday is my birthday.

Add to the mix: a fabulous weekend trip, a Maroon 5 concert tonight, and a fully booked calendar for at least a week to come and you get one happy Cheryl who suddenly isn’t dreading being 28 quite so much. Because my life doesn’t feel quite as stagnant as it did 24 hours ago. And that makes it easier to flow on.

Yep, best.birthday.ever…in fact, dare I say it? best.year.ever. And it starts now.

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It has been almost exactly one year.  One year of work, stress, self-doubt.  One year of stick-to-it-iveness, self-discovery, accomplishment.  A year of new friends and old.  A year of confronting and accepting myself.  One roller-coaster of a year.  And now it’s drawing to a close.

Last night marked my last class of the quarter, of the year, of my Master’s degree, or school ever.  The woosh of relief was slow, as it took time to dawn on me, at which point phone calls and text messages flew.  This chapter is closing and another is opening.  And I, for one, am completely and utterly excited.

The world, it seems, really is my oyster.  Somewhere over the last few weeks, anxiety has eased and my confidence in myself, God, the universe and life all came together.  Things will be ok.  I will be ok.  I will be more than ok.  I am facing new prospects in every area of my life and I am ready to launch forward into it all.

First up, my trip to Dublin.  Then a visit from my mom.  Then a return to the working world that I’ve missed, but a new and improved working world.  I feel like life is full of possibilities and I can’t wait to explore them.

Last week, I had my last physical therapy session for my knee.  As it came to a close, my therapist pointed out that gradually, I had become stronger and now I was more balanced.  She was talking about physically, but I can’t help thinking I’ve achieved that in other ways as well.  Watch out world, here I am…

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Beginning of the End

But in a good way. Tomorrow is the first day of my last quarter of grad school. It’s hard to believe that it’s been almost a year since I left my job and went back to school. A lot has happened in that year. Some of it good (new friends, publication) and some of it not-so-good (stress, seeing some friends less, stress). But in the end, I decided it was worth it to me to stay in the program and soon, I will begin to reap the benefits.

This past week, I have been meeting with people in the PR/corporate communications industry and I am hoping to join it in June. I’m excited to study some PR courses this quarter, and I’m very excited to enter the working world again, in this industry.

I’m also really excited for spring. It was really warm today. I think Kendra sent the warm weather. My windows are open to a nice breeze right now and I’m thinking of spring: pedicures, outdoors, daffodils, white wine, warm weather, the sun. We’re planning a spectacular spring. So, with the end of a rather quiet week comes some exciting beginnings.

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