The One Where I “Start at Home”

Nilsa is moving. She has quite an awesome loft in the South Loop, if anyone is looking. I saw the pictures of her listing and asked her “Did you have to stage it?”

I am moving. I’m amassing furniture for my new place and decided that I would get a brown, leather storage ottoman at Target. “That way,” I tell anyone who will listen, “It can serve as a coffee table, extra seating and it has the storage. It’s multi-functional.”

Both of these lead me to the following conclusion: I have been watching way to much HGTV lately. Oh HGTV, how do I love thee? Let me count the ways:

House Hunters. I’ve been watching House Hunters on and off for quite a few years. In fact, I remember seeing it at Ethan’s Mom’s house, back when she still lived with her parents and we were just college students. Anyway, I love House Hunters, not just because I like to see the houses, but I love to try to guess which house the hunters will pick. Which is why I also find the commercial for it genius. I think everyone who watches the show inevitably debates which house they will pick. I personally add an “I would pick…but I think they will pick…”

Designed to Sell. The catty part of me loves to watch the real estate expert come into the house and declare the exact reason someone’s house is failing to seal the deal, so to speak. Could it be the hideous avacado appliances in the kitchen? Or the lack of dining table in the dining room? The orange shag carpet? The potbelly stove from the 1800’s? I think we all know, even if the clueless seller does not. Oh, and? It’s amazing what those designers can do with $2,000.

Property Virgins. This show, whose name is pretty self-explanatory, is a new discovery, which came about by (gasp) not changing the channel once. But I find it hilarious to see some property newbie wax poetic about the dream house he or she wants for $300,000, only to find that particular house is more like a million. This show is, quite clearly, filmed in Canada. And inevitably the house hunters will enter a room and say “Oh, this is a big room, ay?” or “There’s a lot of light in here, ay?” Plus , they say “house” with a Canadian accent. Anyway, I feel very well-rounded, learning about real estate in a different country. Which is probably why I also like the international version of House Hunters. Nothing is more fun that seeing a teeny-tiny Paris apartment that costs half a million euros. Or a big ol’ beach house in Mexico for very little dinero.

Hidden Potential. This show is awesome because house hunters see three houses, which are usually crap-tastic. Then a designer shows them 3-D renederings of how they will make the place fab after they gut it, make additions, or otherwise alter the crap-tasticness. The only thing I don’t particulary care for is that they don’t go back for an “after” shot once the work is done. Producers? Are you hearing me?

Spice Up My Kitchen. Wherein the designer takes some totally non-functional kitchen not updated since 1945, 1962 or 1977 and improves it with update-y goodness. I love, love, love a good kitchen.

And now you have way too much scary insight into my geekiness. Cause everyone’s a geek about something (or five).