Comments on: Blood In My Mouth http://placesneverplanned.wordpress.com/2007/03/16/blood-in-my-mouth/ Musings on that unpredictable thing called life. Thu, 17 Dec 2009 15:38:54 +0000 http://wordpress.com/ hourly 1 By: kellbobo http://placesneverplanned.wordpress.com/2007/03/16/blood-in-my-mouth/#comment-8086 kellbobo Wed, 28 Mar 2007 19:00:57 +0000 http://placesneverplanned.wordpress.com/2007/03/16/blood-in-my-mouth/#comment-8086 Like the new blog, lady! :) Like the new blog, lady! :)

]]> By: kris http://placesneverplanned.wordpress.com/2007/03/16/blood-in-my-mouth/#comment-8069 kris Fri, 23 Mar 2007 00:59:32 +0000 http://placesneverplanned.wordpress.com/2007/03/16/blood-in-my-mouth/#comment-8069 There couldn't be a more perfect quote for this - it captures exactly what say in the post and what so many of us feel, right along with you. It's hard to be assertive at all the "right" times, and hard not to beat ourselves up for our misses. I'm struggling with this, as well; is it awful to feel some sense of reassurance that I am not alone? There couldn’t be a more perfect quote for this – it captures exactly what say in the post and what so many of us feel, right along with you.

It’s hard to be assertive at all the “right” times, and hard not to beat ourselves up for our misses. I’m struggling with this, as well; is it awful to feel some sense of reassurance that I am not alone?

]]> By: bee http://placesneverplanned.wordpress.com/2007/03/16/blood-in-my-mouth/#comment-8066 bee Thu, 22 Mar 2007 00:36:06 +0000 http://placesneverplanned.wordpress.com/2007/03/16/blood-in-my-mouth/#comment-8066 yeesh. i feel your pain - i find myself speaking a lot sometimes in class and then wondering if people are perceiving me as bossy, or bitchy, or a pain in the ass. and other times, i'm too quiet, or it takes me too long to figure out what i want out of an emotional moment, so i stay silent and lose out. i think a lot of it has to do with how secure we are in ourselves? i could just be talking out of my bum here, but i know that if *i* didn't care so much about what other people thought of me, i would be able to say what i needed in any situation and not worry. i hate group projects though, for the same reason you talked about. (hugs) it's a gigantic learning curve, cheryl, and don't get too hard on yourself. *i* for one am incredibly impressed by you. yeesh. i feel your pain – i find myself speaking a lot sometimes in class and then wondering if people are perceiving me as bossy, or bitchy, or a pain in the ass. and other times, i’m too quiet, or it takes me too long to figure out what i want out of an emotional moment, so i stay silent and lose out.

i think a lot of it has to do with how secure we are in ourselves? i could just be talking out of my bum here, but i know that if *i* didn’t care so much about what other people thought of me, i would be able to say what i needed in any situation and not worry.

i hate group projects though, for the same reason you talked about. (hugs)

it’s a gigantic learning curve, cheryl, and don’t get too hard on yourself. *i* for one am incredibly impressed by you.

]]> By: canaryinacoalmine http://placesneverplanned.wordpress.com/2007/03/16/blood-in-my-mouth/#comment-8065 canaryinacoalmine Tue, 20 Mar 2007 14:48:08 +0000 http://placesneverplanned.wordpress.com/2007/03/16/blood-in-my-mouth/#comment-8065 step on their feet and run like hell- especially if it's a big guy with a gut named bruno glad i found yours again jessica step on their feet and run like hell- especially if it’s a big guy with a gut named bruno

glad i found yours again
jessica

]]> By: marissa http://placesneverplanned.wordpress.com/2007/03/16/blood-in-my-mouth/#comment-8064 marissa Tue, 20 Mar 2007 03:07:14 +0000 http://placesneverplanned.wordpress.com/2007/03/16/blood-in-my-mouth/#comment-8064 That's right, Cheryl! You should speak up because you're worth it. And if you feel slighted in some way, or that someone is stepping on you or doing something wrong to you, then that's all that matters--and you have every right to stand your ground and speak up. (Now if only I could take my own advice...) That’s right, Cheryl! You should speak up because you’re worth it. And if you feel slighted in some way, or that someone is stepping on you or doing something wrong to you, then that’s all that matters–and you have every right to stand your ground and speak up. (Now if only I could take my own advice…)

]]> By: scott http://placesneverplanned.wordpress.com/2007/03/16/blood-in-my-mouth/#comment-8062 scott Mon, 19 Mar 2007 12:56:11 +0000 http://placesneverplanned.wordpress.com/2007/03/16/blood-in-my-mouth/#comment-8062 I hated group projects, always a rough time. Great post Cheryl. It is interesting how we go through these phases. I am sure that you will find your voice again, sometimes though it is easier not to speak up, you know?? Scott I hated group projects, always a rough time. Great post Cheryl. It is interesting how we go through these phases. I am sure that you will find your voice again, sometimes though it is easier not to speak up, you know??

Scott

]]> By: Hart http://placesneverplanned.wordpress.com/2007/03/16/blood-in-my-mouth/#comment-8061 Hart Mon, 19 Mar 2007 09:07:22 +0000 http://placesneverplanned.wordpress.com/2007/03/16/blood-in-my-mouth/#comment-8061 I get pissed at people not pulling their share of a joint effort. Back at the University, I was working on a group project with two other women - one of which I knew, one a total stranger to me. She sounded good on paper, like most people do, but when it came down to it, all she did was give orders and vanish. She had a job she had to go to, and she didn't quite have the time to write her part, but she would "oversee the overall job" when we were done. AS IF! Okay, I'm not the most timid and quiet person, so you can imagine what happened next... :) But I got an A, and she... well, she had to find another group to mooch off on. Take a stand, but choose your battled. Don't let people walk all over you, but don't be me and bite their head off for the smallest things. If you find a balance, let me know how, and I'll join you there! :D I get pissed at people not pulling their share of a joint effort.

Back at the University, I was working on a group project with two other women – one of which I knew, one a total stranger to me.

She sounded good on paper, like most people do, but when it came down to it, all she did was give orders and vanish. She had a job she had to go to, and she didn’t quite have the time to write her part, but she would “oversee the overall job” when we were done.
AS IF!

Okay, I’m not the most timid and quiet person, so you can imagine what happened next… :)

But I got an A, and she… well, she had to find another group to mooch off on.

Take a stand, but choose your battled. Don’t let people walk all over you, but don’t be me and bite their head off for the smallest things. If you find a balance, let me know how, and I’ll join you there! :D

]]> By: Erica http://placesneverplanned.wordpress.com/2007/03/16/blood-in-my-mouth/#comment-8058 Erica Sun, 18 Mar 2007 00:50:33 +0000 http://placesneverplanned.wordpress.com/2007/03/16/blood-in-my-mouth/#comment-8058 I am also still trying to learn to speak up for myself! But I also feel bad when I don't. I hate confrontations and I always try to avoid any embarassment for me or for the other person, but I am sure gradually we will become more outspoken, it's either that or keep it all inside.... I am also still trying to learn to speak up for myself! But I also feel bad when I don’t. I hate confrontations and I always try to avoid any embarassment for me or for the other person, but I am sure gradually we will become more outspoken, it’s either that or keep it all inside….

]]> By: Claire http://placesneverplanned.wordpress.com/2007/03/16/blood-in-my-mouth/#comment-8057 Claire Sat, 17 Mar 2007 11:52:02 +0000 http://placesneverplanned.wordpress.com/2007/03/16/blood-in-my-mouth/#comment-8057 Oh mna, speaking up is a skill I am trying to acquire! I think it can be really hard (particularly if you don't have a Y chromosome!) to stick up for yourself and not feel judged or in the wrong ( I totally empathise with the whole seeking someone out to check your feelings are 'OK'!). Sigh. I hate group projects ~ long live the individual, say I! Cxx Oh mna, speaking up is a skill I am trying to acquire! I think it can be really hard (particularly if you don’t have a Y chromosome!) to stick up for yourself and not feel judged or in the wrong ( I totally empathise with the whole seeking someone out to check your feelings are ‘OK’!). Sigh. I hate group projects ~ long live the individual, say I!

Cxx

]]> By: Everywhere Man http://placesneverplanned.wordpress.com/2007/03/16/blood-in-my-mouth/#comment-8056 Everywhere Man Sat, 17 Mar 2007 02:57:28 +0000 http://placesneverplanned.wordpress.com/2007/03/16/blood-in-my-mouth/#comment-8056 You only get one chance to get it right in life. You might as well do your best. Group projects suck. What does it prove? You can be pulled down by others? Pull others up to your level? What ever happened to letting an individual shine? Mediocracy (sp?) is for lazy professors who hate to grade. You only get one chance to get it right in life. You might as well do your best.

Group projects suck. What does it prove? You can be pulled down by others? Pull others up to your level? What ever happened to letting an individual shine? Mediocracy (sp?) is for lazy professors who hate to grade.

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